The Great Reevaluation

by Bruce Hendrick | Dec 2, 2021

We’ve heard that contentment is not having what we want; it’s wanting what we have. But this framework itself comes from an achievement mentality that seems to be losing its appeal these days. “Wanting” and “having” are no longer the driving forces they used to be.

Before the pandemic, most of us were caught up in pursuing—a position, a person, an income level, or outside approval of some kind. Today, a lot of that just doesn’t seem as important. There is a growing sense in the country and among our clients that life has become more precious, and we cannot waste another moment on things, people, or endeavors that make us unhappy or unfulfilled.

More people are focusing on three human rights, expressed as the 3 Be’s.

  1. To Be I have the right to be fully present, without shame or grandiosity
  2. To Become I have the right to grow and pursue a life of my own choosing
  3. To Belong I have the right to be known and connected in healthy relationships

To the extent a career, a relationship, my current geography, my work hours or location, or even an asset (home, car, etc.) interferes with these things, they are being discarded. This may be surprising to many people, but not to those who are making the changes. One aspect of this is the Great Resignation, but don’t let the labels fool us. It goes way deeper.

We have had a collective brush with death. We’ve gotten sick, lost someone close to us, had a prolonged fear/stress reaction, fought the powers that be, or suffered significant hardship. Or maybe all the above. And we are tired of it. It’s no surprise then when we simplify our lives down to the most important things, and here’s the new twist, in the time we have left. That’s what happens after trauma – things get clearer, fast.

There is a growing urgency that permeates much of our coaching and training work these days. The feeling is, “I want to invest in my team/self/job/company now so that we can succeed and enjoy the ride now.” People want to love how they spend time now, not at the expense of the future, but as a pre-condition.

No, we all don’t have to quit our jobs. But reevaluate? It’s a perfect time. Most of us can claim the 3 Be’s right where we are, but we must communicate our needs constructively and build trust with others to see them realized. We need these skills regardless because if we make that job change, we don’t want to reproduce today’s frustrations at the next place!

Helping people and teams connect with others, solve problems collaboratively, and feel better with less stress – this is Building Trust’s wheelhouse. If we can help you navigate your time of reevaluation, please let us know.