Where'd She Go?
The safer we feel, the more trust thrives.
After a moving performance of Les Misérables, I stood under the theater marquis with my friends for a picture. A gracious woman offered to capture the moment for us, and without hesitation, I offered her my phone for the shot. That was the last I saw of the woman, my phone, and the credit cards stored in its case.
No, that did not happen. But for a second there, we can all imagine it. She took a great picture of us, and we returned the favor just like people do everywhere every day.
We live in a world of vulnerabilities. Some we are aware of, others we aren’t, and others we choose to disregard because we don’t want to live in fear. Outside that theater, it didn’t even occur to me that a smiling stranger could take off with my phone. Could I have been burned at that moment? Sure. But the price of constantly keeping my guard up is too high, at least for me.
When we feel safe, we can relax, be ourselves, enjoy life and work, and get to it. There is less drama in our family. Coworkers deal with issues while still small because looking imperfect and adjusting is okay. Leaders who feel safe consider conflict to be positive because, once resolved, there is growth and opportunity.
I often remind the leaders I work with that it’s our responsibility to help others feel as safe as possible. This includes leveling with people, holding them accountable respectfully and encouragingly, and showing them you have their back.
We know we’re on the right path to trust when people around us reveal their true thoughts and ideas. As leaders, fostering this trust is crucial to creating a safe and open environment.
Meanwhile, many people legitimately would never hand their phones to a stranger. They’ve learned through difficult experiences that safety is fleeting and must be protected with vigilance. These people work at your company, too. Take no offense when they struggle to open up. Just remain focused on providing a safe environment. In their time, they may surprise you with their insights and the depth of their engagement.
Take the pulse of your relationship, family, and company. Maybe some of your challenges can be traced back to the fundamental question, “Do people feel safe?” The safer our environments become, the more trust thrives, and other stressors begin to melt away.
